DEAR DEIDRE: WHENEVER I want to have sex with my boyfriend, he says I am sex mad and tells me to leave him alone.
Yet he had sex with more than 100 women before we met.
I feel like a pest every time I try to make a move on him[/caption]
I am 21 and we have been together for three years.
The sex was great at first but we have had virtually no sex life for the past 18 months or so.
He is 23 and he used to sleep around a lot before he met me, so I can’t understand why he doesn’t want sex with me.
I am becoming very insecure about it.
We had a lovely meal out one evening last week.
When we were in bed afterwards, I asked for sex and he refused.
He told me I am a “sex pest” and said he feels under pressure all the time to have sex.
He says he loves me and wants to be with me but I can’t see a way round this.
DEIDRE SAYS: Sleeping around and having lots of one-night stands is very different from sharing sex with a long-term, caring partner.
Casual sex is just about the physical buzz, while loving, lasting sex requires real emotional intimacy.
He may struggle with that if he was brought up in a cold or unstable family.
Say it is important to you to feel desired and ask him to follow the guidance in my Sex Play Therapy e-leaflet with you. It’s fun, not an ordeal!
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